I recently lost a "friend" to alcoholism, though the truth is, I lost her 22 years ago. In a moment clouded by alcohol, she accused me of something I didn’t do, simply because she couldn’t recall the actual conversation. Over the years, we remained in the same circles because our children were close in age. Despite that, she never trusted me again, and I’m certain, even until the end, she still believed the story she had imagined. To be clear—she believed I had gossiped about her marriage, and had I done so, she would have had every right to be angry. But I didn’t. Yet, her accusations continued to cast shadows on my character for years.

She was breathtakingly beautiful, with an electric smile, raised on an Indian Reservation, a devoted Christian, blessed with more wealth than she knew what to do with, and the mother of three gorgeous children. On the outside, she seemed to have it all. But those who truly knew her could see the weight of cultural pressures that made her doubt her beauty and self-worth. It was heartbreaking. Imagine someone as stunning as Cindy Crawford, yet seeing themselves as unattractive?

No matter how often people reassured her, she couldn’t believe it.

She passed away tragically young. I find myself deeply saddened that she wasn’t able to overcome her inner battles and be there fully for her family. In a perfect world, addiction and mental illness wouldn’t steal from us like this, but we live in a world where they do.

As we continue to build the Wise Community to help women create legacies in the financial world for future generations, I hope we learn to truly listen—not just when life is good, but especially when it's hard, and we are difficult to love. We are meant to live in community with others—that's how we’re designed. And often, it’s our mindset that presents the biggest challenge, not the circumstances.

Let’s work harder to offer each other the same grace we hope to receive when life gets tough. Let’s meet one another where we are. We should celebrate the WINS, but also stand by each other when someone feels isolated and lost.

Last year, I faced a major setback when we lost a big investor for one of our deals. I panicked, convinced that we wouldn’t close and would lose a lot of money. But instead of keeping it to myself, I communicated my need to a Wise group of women, and within a week, we had a team ready to jump in and get the deal done. That deal now has three Wise women on it, and I couldn’t be prouder or more honored to work alongside them. We did it together.

Being vulnerable is often seen as weakness, but in reality, it can be POWER. At Wise, we want to help you tap into that power, wherever you are.

 Stay Wise,

Dedee Boring

Wise Network, Founder